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# Monday, April 30, 2007
Monday, April 30, 2007 7:19:26 AM (Eastern Standard Time, UTC-05:00) ( The Philosopher )

Now that I have a new baby, I'm learning all kinds of things.

I'm also understanding things that I've never understood before. Stuff about how parenthood changes you.

One thing I now understand that I never understood before is Selective Parent Deafness.

Selective Parent Deafness, or SPD, is the ability of a parent to stop hearing the screams and wails of their own child. The wails and screams of other children can still be heard, but their own children are effectively mute.

Before becoming a parent, I was dumbfounded at parents who would let their children have meltdowns in public and subject the rest of us to the concomitant high-decibel caterwauling.

Now I get it. Now I understand that the parents know their child is screaming, but they don't perceive the screaming to be all that bad. They perceive it to be at a much lower level than it actually is.

Armed with this realization, I have decided to do my part to keep public places free of screaming children. I have decided that I will react to any extended crying in public (i.e., more than 30 seconds) as if a klaxon horn was going off right in my ear.

This decision came before I realized that my wife has a much worse case of SPD than I do. Last week, we went to our chiropractor's office and brought the baby with us. All of the doctor's patients are over 18 and, as such, his office is definitely one of those places where screaming children do not belong. Typically, my daughter began having a meltdown as soon as the car was parked. I wasn't about to bring her inside, so I told my wife "Go in, do what you gotta do, then come out, and I'll go in. That way she only cries outside."

I was very proud of my resolve...up until the moment my wife looked at me like this was the dumbest idea she had ever heard of.

"Why do you want to stay outside?" she asked.

"Because the baby is crying like it's been stabbed in the leg by a jagged piece of glass. Nobody wants to hear this." I replied.

"It's not that bad." she said, trying to take the baby.

"NO! Go inside. I'll be here waiting when you get out."

"I don't understand what's wrong. Why do you want to stay out here?"

"JUST GO!"

After shooting me one last glance to let me know she's nominating me for the Moron of the Year Award, she went inside. She was gone for 10 minutes or so. The baby did not shut up the entire time. And she wanted me to subject all of the doctor's patients to that! I realized then that my wife has become one of the insensitive bastards that I used to bitch about.

Then, when my wife got out and it was my turn to go inside, she took the screaming baby from me and followed me in. At that point, I gave up. There was no sense arguing. She was determined that the entire waiting room was going to hear the fortissimo movement from the Baby Concerto.

I'm going to keep fighting this as much as I can but, like any good husband, I can already smell the losing battle. I may be doomed to insensitive bastardhood.

# Sunday, April 29, 2007
Sunday, April 29, 2007 9:46:54 AM (Eastern Standard Time, UTC-05:00) ( The Geek )

My favorite puto and Linux consultant has been interviewed by Free Software Magazine!

Check it out: Free Software Magazine.

# Thursday, April 05, 2007
Thursday, April 05, 2007 12:03:29 PM (Eastern Standard Time, UTC-05:00) ( The Geek )

My good friend Taso has created a site that may revolutionize how people seek out information.

Check out Chatapist.

# Sunday, March 18, 2007
Sunday, March 18, 2007 8:53:36 PM (Eastern Standard Time, UTC-05:00) ( The Chef )

Tonight I was whipping up a batch of Alton Brown's Pantry Friendly Tomato Sauce and, somehow, I absolutely botched it. Too much sugar I think. When I got to the final step and blended it all together, it looked liked it's supposed to...but when I tasted it, it was like eating sugar out of the bag. YUCK!

In vain, I tried to cut my losses by adding some balsamic vinegar, but I was too late. The sauce when from tasting too sweet to tasting like salad dressing. YUCK!

Oh well, it's nights like tonight that pizza delivery was made for.

# Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Tuesday, March 13, 2007 5:05:58 PM (Eastern Standard Time, UTC-05:00) ( Everything Else )

My inhaler ran out on Friday. On Sunday, I started feeling a little fluffy in the chest, so I went out to buy a new Primatene Mist inhaler...only to discover they're pretty much impossible to buy around here (i.e., Charlotte, NC) anymore. I went to three different pharmacies and they all told me the same thing: "We want to stock it, we keep ordering it, but none ever shows up." I went to Eckerd, CVS, and Wal-Mart.

One of the pharmacy assistants offered "I think they're trying to make it better for the environment or sumpin'", which is in line with an article posted on Fark several months back about the federal government requiring manufacturers of these inhalers to stop using CFC propellants by 2008.

After searching several online drug stores, CVS.com finally offered to sell me an inhaler, so I bought 2. The next day they canceled the order and, when I asked why, sent me a mystic e-mail that said they were unable to discuss the reasons for cancellation by e-mail. WTF?

Finally, yesterday, I found one of the SMALL bottles at a CVS about 10 miles away from my house. It was their only one, and the pharmacist told me they only get about 1 bottle/month.

Does anybody know what the hell is going on with this stuff? The manufacturer's website is silent.

# Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Wednesday, March 07, 2007 5:22:51 PM (Eastern Standard Time, UTC-05:00) ( The Political Junkie )

A woman on a trip to New York was arrested when police mistook her for someone else. They took away the woman's 3-year-old daughter.

The police realized their mistake and let the woman go. But it took them two additional days to get the woman's daughter back to her.

This would never happen in a country with BoSFuT. In the world of BoSFuT, this woman would need only call a local BoSFuT representative, explain the situation, a quick vote would be taken amongst citizens, and the city would forced, at gunpoint if need be, to return the child.

In today's world, the woman is forced to battle for 2 days, with increasing feelings of powerlessness, against the fucktards in the government. In the world of BoSFuT, she has all the power.

# Monday, March 05, 2007
Monday, March 05, 2007 12:29:27 AM (Eastern Standard Time, UTC-05:00) ( The Political Junkie )

The problem with government is that it is the only entity in our lives that has the legal right to use force to achieve its ends.

An example: a man refuses to pay his taxes. The government is legally allowed to force payment by confiscating his property and funds in his bank accounts and anything else of value he may possess. Government is legally allowed to do this because, collectively, we understand that even a minimalist government needs a revenue stream and it has to be paid for somehow. Thus, we allow the government to force the recalcitrant to pay.

You as a citizen have no such right to use force. If you lend your neighbor Bob a snow blower and Bob refuses to return it, you cannot use force to get the snow blower back. You can't beat the shit out of Bob; that's assault and battery. You can't sneak onto Bob's property in the middle of the night and get your blower back; that's trespassing. You can, however, go to the government (i.e., court) and get it to order Bob to give your snow blower back. Now if Bob doesn't comply, the government will use force to make him comply.

Thus, you cannot use force, but government can.

Unfortunately, government is a necessary evil, so We the People grant it power, but put laws in place to prevent government from swaggering too much.

That, at least, is the general principle. But it seems to be working less and less.

I don't need to go into any specifics, but if you open any newspaper you can find dozens of daily examples of government using its power of force unjustly or in direct contradiction of the Bill of Rights. The problem we face as citizens is that we are powerless to stop these things.

Sure, we can vote the bad guys out of office. But it seems like it's always a "meet the new boss, same as the old boss" type of situation. We can file writs of habeas corpus and use the courts in other ways to force the government to stop current actions or make reparations for past actions (that whole "petition the government for a redress of grievances" thing), but this is of limited usefulness. The wheels of "justice" move slowly, and we citizens are never guaranteed a "just" result; we are only guaranteed "due process" and some of us, like Jose Padilla, don't even get that.

If we citizens are doing something the government doesn't like, the government has the power to say "you must stop now" and use force, if necessary, to make us stop doing what it doesn't like. We can be arrested or beaten or shot if we do not comply with the government's "stop now" order.

We citizens have no comparable power and we desperately need it. We need the ability to observe an unjust government action taking place and declare "STOP NOW!" and then use force, if necessary, to make the government stop.

To that end, I propose the formation of The Bureau of Stopping Fucktards, or BoSFuT (pronounced "BOSS FOOT").

Perhaps others may find a more genteel name for this organization. I, myself, see its logo being an enormous foot kicking a tiny ass with the word "government" embroidered on it).

BoSFuT will be empowered to force any government (federal, state, county, city, whatever) or agency thereof to stop doing any action. If BoSFuT makes a stop declaration, any government employee or elected official (hereinafter "fucktard") receiving the declaration must immediately cease the offending action. If he does not, he risks being beaten or shot. Fucktards have no right to question BoSFuT. They must simply obey or they will be forced to obey.

To ensure that BoSFuT itself does not become a corrupt organization, it will have no power to compel government to act. It will only have the power to compel government to stop acting. As a result of stopping a government action, BoSFuT will be permitted to compel the release of prisoners, to compel the return of confiscated property, and to otherwise make right what government has made wrong.

BoSFuT will represent the will of the people in ways that government simply cannot. It will be a purely democratic organization, whereas the country as the whole will remain a republic.

I haven't completely thought out all the specifics, but here's an example of how BoSFuT might work:

The City of Charlotte, NC, holds a referendum to decide on whether or not it should build a new basketball arena. The people vote "nay" on this referendum, but the city government decides the people are wrong and proceeds to build the arena anyway.

That actually did happen a few years back. But in this hypothetical world there is BoSFut. In this world, the citizens of Charlotte don't have to bend over and receive the 130 million dollar cock up their asses for the city council's action. Instead, they petition their local BoSFuT to make this bullshit stop. A vote is scheduled for that very evening. The citizens of Charlotte overwhelmingly vote to stop the city from disobeying them. BoSFuT immediately sends armed enforcement personnel to the houses of Charlotte city council members and forces them -- at gunpoint, if necessary -- to make the phone calls/sign the documents required to cancel the construction of the arena.

Some people will complain that the Charlotte city council may find itself subject to breach of contract lawsuits and fines and penalties and whatnot because of BoSFuT's actions. This is not BoSFuT's concern. All BoSFuT does is stop bad governmental behavior.

Here's another example, from yesterday's news. The Glendora, CA city council votes to make placing campaign signs on public property illegal. A city councilman (who voted for that law) puts his signs on public property anyway. Two teenagers point out the hypocrisy by placing stickers on those signs saying "This sign violates Glendora city ordinance". Incensed, the councilman calls the cops and the teenagers are arrested.

This would never happen in a world where BoSFuT exists. However, if it did, you can bet that the reasonable people of Glendora would immediately petition BoSFuT about this matter. An emergency vote would be taken, and BoSFuT personnel would show up at the police station with weapons drawn to force the police to release the two teenagers.

My only regret is that I could not, in good conscience, allow BoSFuT to beat the shit out of the arresting officer while simultaneously yelling "What the fuck were you thinking, fucktard?" That would just be jackbooted thuggery and one of the points of BoSFuT is preventing jackbooted thuggery.

In a world where BoSFut exists, there would be no Waco. There would be no Ruby Ridge. There would be no Elian Gonzalez. Congressman William J. Jefferson would no longer be in office. The city of New London, CT would be forced to return the property it stole from Susette Kelo.

As you can see, a world with BoSFut is a wonderful place indeed! Write your congress critter today and ask them to sponsor a BoSFut bill. Only you can prevent bureaucrats from fucking up your life.

# Saturday, February 24, 2007
Saturday, February 24, 2007 9:01:25 AM (Eastern Standard Time, UTC-05:00) ( The Geek )

Came to the computer, needing to print. Hit print button. No joy. Look at the display. No display. No flashy little lights on the console. All symptoms point to loss of power.

Can't be loss of power. Printer's had power non-stop for almost 2 years. It's even on the UPS.

Look around the room. Computer on. Lights on. House has power. But printer acts like it has no power.

But it can't be power loss. Printer's had power non-stop for almost 2 years.

Scratch head. Apply Occam's razor. Simplest answer is that printer has no power. Sigh. It's pointless and time wasting, but try anyway. Check power connector on back of printer. It's snug. Follow cable. Follow cable over bookcase. Follow cable under chair cushion. Finally get to wall.

Fuck. Printer not on UPS. Printer not plugged in. Wife unplugged printer to charge cell phone. Why cellphone charger needs uninterruptable power? Question for another day.

Sigh. "That's why we ask stupid troubleshooting questions."

Dammit.